Criminal Minds House Song
by SparkleK
Summary: This is based on the idea that each character of criminal minds has a quote that fits in the hogwarts house song by Ministry of Magic.


Criminal Minds House Sort

Don't own anything!

This is based on the idea that each character of criminal minds has a quote that fits in this song.

I'm a Ravenclaw

I like to read books

When I cast spells

They're off the frickin' hook

Spencer Reid Quote:

Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner: This is Special Agent Dr. Reid.

FBI Student: Oh, you look too young to have gone to medical school.

Dr. Spencer Reid: They are Ph.D.'s, three of them.

FBI Student: What, are you a genius or something?

Dr. Spencer Reid: I don't believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified, but I do have an IQ of 187, an eidetic memory, can read 20,000 words per minute.

[pause]

Dr. Spencer Reid: Yes, I'm a genius.

I'm a Gryffindor

I'll fly with my friends

We'll never back down

And fight to the end

Derek Morgan Qoute

Emily Prentiss: Okay, yeah, I understand that. But that course is designed to force failure. That's how we learn.

Derek Morgan: And my job is to train the trainees, not to be their friend.

Emily Prentiss: Look, I know you're doing the tough love thing, but they don't know you like I do.

I'm a Slytherin

I am very rich

I'll go on a date

With whoever gets the snitch

Elle Greenaway Quote

Dr. Spencer Reid: Do you think it's weird that I knew that ballad?

Elle Greenaway: Reid, I don't know how you know half the stuff you know, but I'm glad you do.

Dr. Spencer Reid: Do you think that's why I can't get a date?

Elle Greenaway: Have you ever asked anyone?

[Reid shifts his eyes]

Elle Greenaway: That's why you can't get a date.

I'm a Hufflepuff

Just stayin' relaxed

Gimme drinks and friends

No feuds we got tact

Penelope Garcia Quote

Derek Morgan: Take this gun.

Penelope Garcia: I don't believe in guns.

Derek Morgan: Ok, trust me they are very real take it.

[Speaking]

(Slytherin): Ew, who brought the Hufflepuff?

(Hufflepuff): Hey, I'm just trying to have a good time over here.

Have a good time

A good time

I'm a Ravenclaw

I got wit beyond measure

I can catch a snitch

like it's caught up in a tether

Aaron Hotchner

Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner: [indicating the hogtied prisoners] We took down these four.

Dr. Spencer Reid: Without firing a shot?

John Blackwolf: Captain America here shot number five.

Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner: You're welcome. Number six is cut up pretty bad. I don't think he's gonna make it.

John Blackwolf: At least I didn't shoot him.

Derek Morgan: I think I'd rather be shot.

I'm a Slytherin

The house of the snake

Come get in my way

And get tossed in the lake

Jason Gideon Quote

Gideon: This is going to hit you, and when it does, there's only three facts you need to know. You did what you had to do, and alot of good people are alive because of it.

Reid: What's the third?

Gideon: I'm proud of you.

I'm a Gryffindor

And we own the sky

Yeah, we always win

With our rally cry

Jennifer Jareau Quote

Jennifer 'JJ' Jareau: I'm thankful for my years spent with this family, for everything we shared, every chance we had to grow. I'll take the best of them with me and lead by their example wherever I go.

I'm a Slytherin

The top of my class

If you disagree

I'll kick your Muggle ass

David Rossi Quote

Rossi: Let us consider that we are all insane. It will explain us to each other; it will unriddle many riddles...

[Speaking]

(Alex): Uh, Alan, do you even know what Harry Potter is?

(Alan): Well, I haven't read the books, but I've seen all the movies!

Let's beat him up

Let's beat him up

George Foyet Quote

George Foyet: Try to relax, the blade goes in so much easier.

I'm a Slytherin

A big fan of Snape

If it's a MoM album

We have to say Snape

John Curtis Quote

Curtis: You really think your team is gonna save you?

Strauss: I know they will.

Curtis: Did you get everything you wanted?

I'm a Hufflepuff

We're true to the end.

United we stand

So I'll stand with my friends

Ashley Seaver Quote

David Rossi: This won't be easy, Ashley. It may trigger some extremely painful memories.

Ashley Seaver: I appreciate the concern, but when your father kills 25 women before you're a teenager, painful memories don't need a trigger. They just are.

I'm a Gryffindor

As brave as the come

And my namesake sword

Will get the job done.

Emily Prentiss Quote

Emily Prentiss: [defending her team to the Senate committee] They do their jobs with integrity. And most importantly, they honor their oath. "I will support and defend the Constitution of the United States of America against all enemies, foreign and domestic. I will bear true faith and allegiance to the same. That I take this obligation freely, without any mental reservation or purpose of evasion. That I will well and faithfully discharge the duties of the office on which I am about to enter, so help me God."

I'm a Ravenclaw

My brain is super fast

Like Sheldon Cooper

But not a total ass.

Diana Ried Quote

Dr. Spencer Reid: Dr. Norman gave me permission to sleep on the couch in your room tonight, if it's all right with you.

Diana Reid: [to Dr. Norman] If anyone tries to keep him in here any longer, I'll scratch your eyes out.

Dr. Norman: [to Spencer] One night only.

[Dr. Norman walks away]

Diana Reid: It helps if they think you're crazy. They don't argue.

[Speaking]

(Luke): So who's this Sheldon Cooper guy, anyway, Aaron?

(Aaron): He's from the show The Big Bang Theory.

You're out of the band.

He's no Spock

I don't want to go


End file.
